Updated: Jun 11, 2020
I'm a helper by nature. I always cared more about people than money or things. How was I to know that my nature would lead me down the darkest road. Codependency is a chronic and progressive set of behaviors that affected my ability to have a healthy, mutually satisfying relationship. Make no mistake, I was not a victim. My behaviors were caused by my belief that I was incapable of coping with my life without others. I am not worthy. I am not enough. I need you to justify my existence.
I've been in recovery for 10 years from my codependency. I've spent most of the last decade single. Too afraid to fall back into those old patterns and end up in that dark place again. But over the past year I've been dating again. The first guy helped me practice paying attention to my emotions and the hidden motives for my behavior. Of course he wasn't aware of this but I thank God for him and will love his soul forever for the part he played in my recovery. I know I'm going to overcome my codependency and I will have a healthy and fulfilling relationship with the right man, at the right time, for the right purpose. Today, I love all of me!
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